Bugs

Locust infestiation has long been associated with puppies. Having a puppy will undoubtedly lead to severe locust infestation. Unless you have a big bug collection due next week in 7th grade science class, I would not recommend this. As recently as 2004 have there been mass locust outbreaks in Africa.

I reached noted Puppy Researcher and Conspiracy Theorist Dr. Martin Van Nostrand at his residence in New York this week. Dr. Van Nostrand: “I have been researching the phenomenon of Puppies effects on the world for over 30 years, and the 2004 African Locust outbreak may have been their crowning achievement in environmental and ecological destruction. Over the past ten years, we have seen an immense expansion of puppies in West Africa in countries like Senegal, Niger, Mali and Morocco. This carries a direct correlation to the locust outbreak of ’04. You see, when puppies are left unattended, they scavenger for food in garbage, refuse and empty fields. It’s this rummaging in the bush that stirs up the locusts and causes them to breed. My question is this, puppies: Hasn’t Africa suffered enough?” Well said, Doctor. Thanks again for your time. I’m just trying to save Africa.

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